I met Tony on OKCupid. He’s a 37 year old journalist and initially reached out to me. We chatted on the OKCupid messenger for a while before he asked to take it to text. They always ask to take it to text.
I use online dating as a tool to get the date, not a tool to do the dating so maybe I’m doing it wrong? Something that i’ve noticed on my 50 Fat Dates quest is that if a date is set a week in advance, then the guy will want to fill that week with daily texts. I’d rather just meet the person then continue the texting after that.
Tony asked me for a photo, which is usually a red flag but said it was so he could put my pic on his phone. I told him he could use one of the ones on the OKCupid profile. That was the first sign something weird was afoot. He got a bit too over familiar with the texts, which I blew off as him trying to be flirty. Here’s my pre-date Instagram video as I walked to the restaurant.
A video posted by Kelly Glover (@bigcurvylove) on
We met after work at 7pm and there was no mistaking who I was meeting out the front of BJs (yes I know) in Culver City. Tony is really big guy. Not only is he 6’3″, he is also about twice my size!
As the waiter walked us to our table I noticed the entire restaurant was nothing but booths! Holy cow, the plus size daters personal nightmare! The last date I had trouble with the extremely high bar stools now it’s back to big booty and the restaurant booth issue. Not only that, the waiter sat us in tiny two person booth. I was less worried about how i’d fit in but how Tony would. If it was going to be uncomfortable for me then it was going to be worse for him. He didn’t ask to be moved and Tony seemed to be fine so we went on with the date.
I ordered a beer and Tony decided a pitcher for the two of us would be a better option. Fine with me! We hadn’t even looked at the menu and he was already on his phone. Really!? I make it a point to turn mine on silent during a date and not check it at all. He checked five times during dinner.
The conversation was awkward and Tony didn’t really have what i’d say was a friendly demeanor. Maybe he was in a bad mood because the restaurant booth was squishing him? He asked the regular questions like how did you end up in the USA, do you have brothers or sisters, do you want kids blah blah blah.
He was talking about some kind of heavy metal band cruise and somehow the conversation turned to guns. He tells me he has two guns in is home and that he’d have no problem shooting someone’s face off! He went into full detail while I was eating my dinner. Suddenly I felt like I was on an episode of CSI looking across the table at the killer. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. Then he tells me if tasers were legal he’d taser someone, then when they woke up he’d taser them again until they pooped themselves. OMG who was I sitting across from!!!????
We talked about Australia for a while then he tells me “Australians are belligerent, you’d understand” What? No, I don’t understand and I don’t agree. This date was quickly turning into an argument but I was intent on seeing it through to the end
The subject changes to work and it turns out he he writes about wrestling amongst other things so I asked if he new an ex WWE wrestler I know. “Yeah, I know him. He’s an **hole!” What? Now he’s insulted the only person we have in common. I was just wishing the date would end. We’d finished our meal, the check had been paid and he just kept talking. I felt the date could have ended 30 minutes earlier than it did.
He noticed I was really tired and poured himself another been and chugged it. I did struggle to get out of the restaurant booth (strangely he popped right out elegantly with no problem.) I did notice the other diners were looking at us and some were sniggering and whispering. I guess they’ve never seen two fat people on a date before. I’ll admit this made me feel really self conscious and I just wanted to get home after a long day at work and this weird date.
Tony offered to drive me to my car but I declined (I didn’t want to be the Australian he tasered or shot.) I was so surprised to get a text from him before I even arrived home saying I had a great personality and he wanted to see me again. There is no way this is going beyond one date. No way, I’d rather taser myself!
50 Fat Dates Recap
His Outfit: T-shirt and jeans
Meeting Place: BJs in Culver City
Beverages: A pitcher of beer to share (he skulled the last glass)
The Conversation: Guns, tazers, heavy metal cruises, MMA, wrestling, movies, how he hates the only person we have in common.
The date lasted: About 3o minutes longer than I would have liked.
The date ended: When he could see I was exhausted.
Second Date? Despite him looking at me like he hated me. I got a text saying let’s to this again. This confused me and I don’t feel he’s my potential husband so I politely declined.