I’ve been sitting in my car for 45 minutes and have finally accepted I’ve been stood up. I feel that there is a ‘polite’ amount of time to wait for someone and for me 45 minutes is well and truly enough time (if someone hasn’t shown or responded to texts or voicemails.)
Here’s what happened. Date #9 on my 50 Fat Dates quest was supposed to be a fun lunch by the beach in Venice with a guy called Jonathan, whom I met this week on Plenty of Fish. We started chatting with each other on Wednesday afternoon and moved the conversation to text.
Everything was going great (or so I thought.) Jonathan had been texting me daily and we made the date for noon on Saturday in Venice. He chose the location and I agreed, even thought it’s an hour trip. I thought he was making an effort to choose a nice location by the beach so I was pleased about the effort and interested to see what he had come up with.
Jonathan is 34, runs his own business, has no kids, is a non-smoker, has a dog and had so far been nice and articulate. His photos looked nice and I had been looking forward to this date and meeting him in person. Believe me when I tell you there were no signs that he wasn’t interested. None. In fact, his communication had me thinking quite the opposite! He’d been all chit-chatty for the three days since we ‘met’ online.
Usually, I prefer not have constant chit chat online or via text and just see what happens on the date. It’s far too easy to get the wrong impression online or get a false sense of advancing the relationship too soon. In person is a cold-hard reality check of ‘is this person who they say they are and how do I feel when I meet them face-to-face.’
So Saturday finally comes and I drive an hour to get from Hollywood to Venice only to see that the restaurant he chose was boarded up and clearly closed. At this point I think Jonathan mustn’t have been there for a while and didn’t know so I sent him a text saying I had arrived and asked where he had parked. No response.
Okay, maybe he was driving and didn’t want to answer to phone? That’s fine. I wait a bit longer and leave a voicemail. No response.
I’m starting to get suspicious so rather than pay $25 to park (that’s the cost in Venice since it’s a tourist spot near the boardwalk) lot drive around find a 1hour parking meter. I call and leave a voice message and wait in my car.
Nothing. No text. No phone call. I have been officially stood up and was all the way out in Venice.
The thing that annoys me the most is that I wasted my time and had turned down other plans in order to go on the date. Here’s me literally sitting in my car waiting for the date and the ‘acceptable time’ before heading home.
I still don’t know why he ghosted. If he was no longer interested then a simple text would have been fine. It’s not like we had even spoken or that I would get upset and take it personally. We hadn’t even met! What guys (or anyone) who stands another person up needs to know is that you’ve wasted someone else’s time. Here’s what goes into a date:
1. Washed my hair & did my make up (60 mins)
3. Drive Hollywood to Venice (60 mins)
4. Waited 45 minutes
5. Drove home (60 mins)
Total time: 3hrs 45 mins
My Outfit: Super cute London Times dress via City Chic
His Outfit: NA
Meeting Place: A boarded up restaurant in Venice called Nikki’s
Beverages: A drive thru diet coke on the way home.
The Conversation: Me asking myself what i’m doing???
The date lasted: 0 minutes
The date ended: After I waited 45 minutes and gave up.
Overall score: 0/10
Did he ask me out again? No
Second Date? Not even a first date